I once had a therapist tell me that I was “a high-capacity person”. She said it her therapist tone – so neutral that I had no idea if this was a good thing or a bad thing.
I could have asked her, but of course I chose to overthink it instead.
I like to be busy; it makes me feel happy. Sometimes my brain is so awake and alive that doing only one thing seems boring – so of course I have to do multiple things at the same time. Why just watch a movie when I can also play a game on my phone? Why just attend a virtual work meeting when I can also respond to emails and listen to music? Why just sit on the porch with a lovely beverage enjoying the sunshine when I can also plan out my yard refresh in my imagination?
Sure, I’ve heard that multitasking is a myth. Science tells us that we aren’t really doing two things at once; we’re just switching between the two quickly, and the time it takes to switch is just wasted time. *
In the words of the incredible Ron Swanson from Parks & Recreation:
“Never half-ass two things; whole-ass one thing.” **
But I’m special. I was in the gifted and talented program in elementary school. I’m “a high-capacity person”. Surely this wisdom doesn’t apply to me.
Except it does apply to me. And it applies to you too.
We recently had the privilege of eating at the United States’ largest smorgasbord. *** All-you-can-eat home-style cooking as far as the eye could see. Plates piled high with an assortment of overcooked beige food.
As a smorgasbord, all the plates are the same size. **** The capacity of that plate is determined only by one’s ability to balance and desire to have foods touching.
In real life, we have different size plates. And sometimes the size of our plate can vary from day to day. So perhaps most days I have a giant serving dish as a plate – but that doesn’t mean I won’t wake up to a plate the size of a teacup saucer tomorrow. And that also doesn’t mean I’m forced to fill that plate to its ultimate capacity.
Mindfulness can be a good thing. To live in the moment. To be present to the little things happening around us. To sit on the porch with no agenda other than to experience the porch. To give my full attention to the person in the virtual work meeting with me.
Instead of justifying my chaotic brain with, “I’m a high-capacity person!”, I remind myself that just because I have that capacity does not mean I must or should use that capacity at 110% at all times. Because some days my plate isn’t as big as it was yesterday. And sometimes it’s good to just pick one thing to focus on enjoying instead of smooshing all the things together.
How big is your plate today? How full is your plate?
* https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/creativity-without-borders/201405/the-myth-of-multitasking
** https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Yq46oeK_JDQ
*** https://www.shady-maple.com/smorgasbord/
**** Except in the dessert area. Why they put teeny plates near the best part of the spread, I’ll never know.